areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
