soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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