all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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