This girl is more easily done than said...
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
