she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
