just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I could fuck to npr.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
