anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
