You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
