They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
