Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I can't turn off my feet"
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
