he wants to bone in the snuggie
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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