Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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