I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
