Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
