He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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