There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize
