youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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