I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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