shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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