Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
