So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize