Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize