Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
