I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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