I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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