he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize