Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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