I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize