We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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