I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
