When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
