I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
