it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize