his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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