You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
