her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
