people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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