i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
