Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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