We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Who died my cat blue again?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
