Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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