I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize