The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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