She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize