This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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