Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
