How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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