If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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