i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize