so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
