May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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