i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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